Life Lessons: KUCH TO LOG KAHENGE LOGOKA KAM HAI KEHNA CHORO BEKAR KI BATO MEI KAHI BITNA JAYE REHNA.

KUCH TO LOG KAHENGE LOGOKA KAM HAI KEHNA 

CHORO BEKAR KI BATO MEI KAHI BITNA JAYE REHNA.

I was listening to this song and thinking the person who wrote this is a great observer and writer. I thought to reflect about it.

There will be several types of people who will be there in your life. Some will bring happiness, some will bring experience, some life lessons. Some will hurt your heart every possible way, some will be there to heal you. Some will be jealous of you and some will be happy in your happiness. Some will judge you about everything you do, some will guide you to do better in life. 

When you meet people, who are always judging you, do bullying, emotional violence, pass comments that hurt you, just ignore them and stay silent. When they will know it does not affect you, they will stop. If they still keep on hurting you, just ask them upfront about their behavior, they will stop.

I met a girl who is always complaining about life. She complains about how after married life, she lost her freedom to enjoy life. For her, enjoying life means just travelling and no family responsibilities. But she chose a life of a housewife. Still she compares her life with everyone. She compares her life with her friends in social media, she compares her life with her relatives, she compares her life with celebrities. After comparing she gets upset and unhappy that she does not have a better life and shows her frustrations and anger on others. This disturbs the mental peace in family and affects so many people around her. Such person will never be happy in their life.

I know many times, many people will hurt you emotionally and you may drained physically and mentally. But if you can only focus on your goals of life rather than what others say, you will be more successful. People cannot hurt you, if you are blind, deaf and mute to what others negative actions. 

I have observed in some cases, 

If you enjoy eating some food, they will say you eat too much of food, you are fat for this reason. 

If you eat less, they will say, are you on diet to lose weight, you do not look good.

They will not think that an individual person can have their own taste and preferences, food habits and restrictions.

If you bring gifts for them out of love, they will not appreciate it and find some faults in gift and not even say 'thanks'. 

If you do not bring any gifts, they will think you don't want to bring gifts for them and be upset.

They will never understand the amount of time and energy is spend in selecting and buying the gift from one store to another store. The amount of thoughtfulness in bringing the gift. It feels good when someone accepts the gifts with joy and happiness and you feel its worth after seeing them smile. But there was some people who was never happy, when I gifted them they would say its not good for use, they have it etc. 

If you dress simple, traditional and ethnics clothes, they say you are out of fashion and trend. 

If you dress modern western attire, they say you are indecent and revealing . 

They will not understand clothes are worn also for comfort, based on location, climate and choice.

If you cook in perfection like restaurant style, they will say its too much of species and cant be consumed.

If you cook simple meals, they will say there is no special menu cooked today.

If you are a working women, they will say you do not take care of family

If you don’t work and be home maker; they will say there is so much of financial burden on husband.

If you talk with them, they will say you talk too much

If you are silent, they will say you are not social person.

If you spend more, they will say why are you not saving money.

If you spend less, they will say you are greedy, you don't spend.

They don't know the struggles, the life we are living, the thought process, the love we hold inside.

Every time some people will criticize you, judge you, and talk behind you and never be happy. So do what you makes you happy, do what defines you.

Do not get affected by these people

Do your duty sincerely.

Ignore what others say about you.

Ignore what others think about you

Focus on yourself and your goals.

Forgive others, but don't forget they can hurt you again. Be prepared to handle them wisely.

Remember those who speak more, they do less. 

Respect elders, but if you  they are doing something wrong, talk to them.

Be silent when nothing works. Save your energy for good deeds.

I met a woman (House wife) today she was having a conversation in a group, it goes like this,

There was so many working women who keep cook and go out for official tour for several days leaving their kids and family alone for longer duration. They don't care about the family. 

I am not surprised about this, because so many people assume so many things about you, without knowing you. But this makes me really sad and angry at same time. How can one judge someone without knowing what they do or do not do. A working women is supporting financially to a house and taking care of both family and office work. If she keeps a cook for cooking or a maid for household chores, what's wrong with that? Yes, its challenging to work on both household chores and office work, but they try their best to keep a balance between two. I feel when kids are more independent when they have working parents. I have seen many working women who spend more time for their family than on themselves. Even if they take some time for themselves, no one should judge them. I have seen new moms who just sleep for two hours each day to take care of new born baby and also do cooking and household chores. I feel anyone who focusses on career and job should not be criticized that they don't take care of family.

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